"That's the last time I yolo ever again. I mean it, I really do. I swear it. Honestly, I do mean it. Really!"
Suddenly his vision went black, and he slipped into unconsciousness, the world around him fading to darkness.
"Ssssssssss..." Holden heard a fait whisper. "SSSSSSSSssss. SSSsssssnn. Ssssnnnnn. Sssooooooonnn. Sonn. SON!!!"
The whisper grew and grew until it felt like someone was shouting in Holden's ear. He realized that he could open his eyes, and that he was standing in a dark and empty space that he couldn't fully describe. A cloud of shadow somehow darker than the pitch black around him began to take form. The image before him became more and more clear until he could make out a cloudy lion hovering in the sky.
"Father!" Holden exclaimed. "What's going on here? Where am I?"
"You are neither here no there, up or down, left or right."
Holden's brain began to fizzle out and shut down. "Uhhhhhhh..."
"Lol! It was just a joke. Yolo, right?!" Holden gazed blankly at the lion. "Alright, fine. I'll help you out. Now, there's nothing I can do about your fall. You got yourself into this mess, you have to get yourself out. I can, however, direct you where to go next. If you survive the landing you must head east and seek out the one known as Legolas. He is an elf, and will be able to train you in the ways of the Schwarz. You can do it, son. You just gotta belieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv..."
"Dad, what are you doing?"
"Um, you know, dramatic effect?" Holden didn't reply. "Oh fine! I'm going now." There was a puff of smoke, and he was gone.
Holden opened his eyes and realized he was speeding towards the ground at an alarming rate. As the ground grew ever closer, he noticed a small patch of water directly beneath him. It looked to be about one meter by one meter. Judging by the height of the tree by the pool, it had to be at least two blocks deep. HE WAS SAVED! Holden hit the water and didn't even feel a thing. He climbed back onto dry land and looked around.
"Woah," he said, brushing water out of his eyes, looking around. There was no sign of life in sight, so he decided to walk east like his father had said. Still, after forty days and forty nights, he had found nothing. Feeling hopeless, Holden plopped himself onto the ground, but suddenly felt a bulge in his back pocket. He withdrew whatever he had and--DA DA DA DAAAAAAAAAAAAA--found he was holding his GPS!
"YES!" he shouted.
The GPS lead him east for hours, but finally he heard it say with a kind, feminine voice "You have reached your final destination!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holden screamed, throwing the device to the ground and stomping it to pieces. He fell to the ground, heaving.
Suddenly, a shadow fell over him, and he looked up to see a tall elf that looked exactly like stud-of-an-actor Orlando Bloom. Well, if Orlando Bloom didn't have any legs and got around with a pair of stilts he had tied to his nugget-shaped torso.
"Oh, you must be Legolas. My father sent me and said that you would help me learn the ways of the Schwarz in my quest for the Goblet of Water."
"Ah, the Schwarz, the weapon of the Jed. Yes, I can teach you this, but I do not give my knowledge freely."
"Well, what do you want? All I have is some old lembas bread," Holden said, taking a bite. "It's good, see?"
"I do not need your lembas bread. I am here to help you, but I will not be giving you the power of the Schwarz. At least, no yet. First, you must travel to Mount Doom and challenge the great demon the resides there. It's a horrible creature, really. A dark and powerful AI that can place itself in the skin of others. You may know who I'm talking about."
"Um, no, actually, I don't."
"He goes by many different names. Some call him Sméagol and Gollum, but you may know him as Mercution!"
"WHAT?! But Dlanor sacrificed his life to kill Mercution. What a fool," laughed Holden.
"Yes, your friend Dlanor sacrificed himself for nothing. It's quite sad actually. But, you can still avenge him by killing Mercution. Then, take the ring of Schwarz that he is guarding. If you bring it to me, only then will I teach you how to use it in your quest for the Goblet of Water."
"Alright, fine. OR I can give you some lembas bread and we'll call it even?" offered Holden. "It's really tasty! Here, I'll even put some strawberry jam on it."
"NO!" snapped Legolas.
Return Home
"Dad, what are you doing?"
"Um, you know, dramatic effect?" Holden didn't reply. "Oh fine! I'm going now." There was a puff of smoke, and he was gone.
Holden opened his eyes and realized he was speeding towards the ground at an alarming rate. As the ground grew ever closer, he noticed a small patch of water directly beneath him. It looked to be about one meter by one meter. Judging by the height of the tree by the pool, it had to be at least two blocks deep. HE WAS SAVED! Holden hit the water and didn't even feel a thing. He climbed back onto dry land and looked around.
"Woah," he said, brushing water out of his eyes, looking around. There was no sign of life in sight, so he decided to walk east like his father had said. Still, after forty days and forty nights, he had found nothing. Feeling hopeless, Holden plopped himself onto the ground, but suddenly felt a bulge in his back pocket. He withdrew whatever he had and--DA DA DA DAAAAAAAAAAAAA--found he was holding his GPS!
"YES!" he shouted.
The GPS lead him east for hours, but finally he heard it say with a kind, feminine voice "You have reached your final destination!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Holden screamed, throwing the device to the ground and stomping it to pieces. He fell to the ground, heaving.
Suddenly, a shadow fell over him, and he looked up to see a tall elf that looked exactly like stud-of-an-actor Orlando Bloom. Well, if Orlando Bloom didn't have any legs and got around with a pair of stilts he had tied to his nugget-shaped torso.
"Oh, you must be Legolas. My father sent me and said that you would help me learn the ways of the Schwarz in my quest for the Goblet of Water."
"Ah, the Schwarz, the weapon of the Jed. Yes, I can teach you this, but I do not give my knowledge freely."
"Well, what do you want? All I have is some old lembas bread," Holden said, taking a bite. "It's good, see?"
"I do not need your lembas bread. I am here to help you, but I will not be giving you the power of the Schwarz. At least, no yet. First, you must travel to Mount Doom and challenge the great demon the resides there. It's a horrible creature, really. A dark and powerful AI that can place itself in the skin of others. You may know who I'm talking about."
"Um, no, actually, I don't."
"He goes by many different names. Some call him Sméagol and Gollum, but you may know him as Mercution!"
"WHAT?! But Dlanor sacrificed his life to kill Mercution. What a fool," laughed Holden.
"Yes, your friend Dlanor sacrificed himself for nothing. It's quite sad actually. But, you can still avenge him by killing Mercution. Then, take the ring of Schwarz that he is guarding. If you bring it to me, only then will I teach you how to use it in your quest for the Goblet of Water."
"Alright, fine. OR I can give you some lembas bread and we'll call it even?" offered Holden. "It's really tasty! Here, I'll even put some strawberry jam on it."
"NO!" snapped Legolas.
Return Home
This book is really engaging me!
ReplyDelete